Thursday, August 27, 2009

Nerves makin fun of me


Today, tomorrow, and then I'm off, well, not to NZ but to Wales and then I won't see home for quite a bit over nine months. On some level I think I've come to terms with NZ, I am looking forward to it, problem lies in the leaving, I really don't feel prepared. I've packet practically everything, I'm printing off travel details today etc, visa is ready and so is passport.

But apart from the bags on my floor there is nothing in my room that indicates my soon departure. The room is a tip (its my room what you expect?), there's clothes everywhere and a ton of stuff I have no idea what to do with, two or three unfinished sewing projects are lying around hoping I'll have time tomorrow (by which time everything else should theoretically be ready ;) ) basically, I am far from coming to terms with leaving.

Nine months go so fast (that's what they all keep telling me) and I'll be back in no time, but what is gonna happen in those nine months? How much of my friends and families lives will I not miss out on? Well not miss out on, I will keep in touch, but I wont BE there. I dunno, feels strange.

Off course having nightmares doesn't help especially when one of them involves emergency landing with plane on water right after take-off. Even though I've flown a lot (I'm probably pushing 80 or so take-offs) the take-offs and the landings always scare me though I know the risks are in fact ridiculously low... My brain is so playing tricks on me... And guess what? Its extremely annoying...

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